(verse 1)
G
Mom made beans for dinner
C
You know I ate 'em all
G D
She said come get your coat on, we're goin' to the mall
G C
Gonna visit Santa and sit upon his knee
D C G
But all that I could think about was how not to cut the cheese
G C
While waiting there for Santa, I thought that I'd explode
G D
The gas bubble grew bigger with every "Ho, Ho, Ho"
G C
Tried my best to hide it, thought I was doing swell
D N/C
But when I sat down on Santa's lap, he hollered "What's that smell!"
G C G D
I farted on Santa's lap, now Christmas is gonna stink for me
G C D C G
I farted on Santa's lap, now I'll get *fart* under my Christmas tree
(verse 2)
G
I asked him for a baseball
C
I asked him for a bat
G D
I asked him for some ice skates but I'll get none of that
G C
I asked him for a lot of things I'll have to do without
D G D G
'Cause when I sat on Santa's lap, I let one slip out
(Back to Chorus)
(verse 3)
E A
On Christmas Eve I snuck out of my bed without a sound
E B
Went down to the living room just to take a look around
E A
It was then that I saw Santa next to the Christmas tree
B B E
His arms were full of presents and they were all for me
E A
He put them on a pile and got up to turn around
E B
And blew a fart with such great force our tree almost came down
E A
And so I'll always cherish that special moment when
B A E
I realized even old Saint Nick rips one now and then
E A E B
I farted on Santa's lap and Christmas didn't stink for me
E A B A E
I farted on Santa's lap and Santa left one on my Christmas tree