Transcribed by Rob email-removed Here we go! G A# C F (x4) G A# C F My girlfriend don't love me no more, G A# C F I'm trying my best but she wants more. A#(pm) C(pm) She says 'Why can't you be like that guy on TV? A#(pm) F(stop) He calls himself naked but wears a skivvy.' G A# C F I decided to make her some food. G A# C F Well, I stood at the stove in the nude, A#(pm) C(pm) But then I found out, why he's not tackle out, A#(pm) Why his not in the buff, C(pm) While he's cooking his stuff. F(let ring) I discovered a whole new meaning to fat fire! G C D I'm trying so hard to impress her, G C D But in the kitchen I'm making a mess-er. G F Em My pasta's a huge disaster, G F Em She's not in a hurry to eat my curry, D(let ring) And my soup spelt backwards is poos. C G I've got a new recipe, A Maybe if he uses it, she'll love me. G C F Oh postie please deliver, G C F My sandwich to Jamie Oliver. G F Em That would be the best gift I could give her, D(let ring) G If my sultana sandwich made it on the Naked Chef. G A# C F (x2) (Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Alright! Rocking out to the kids man! This is the impro bit) G A# C F I can just see him now on his show, G A# C In between washing his car and riding his moped. A#(pm) C(pm) His beautiful flat, and his trendy speech impediment, D(let ring) Does he ever have time to cook? G A# C F Well, what we've a got now is this new recipe posted in from Merrick, yeah Merrick, yeah. It's a sultana sandwich, you know, it's a bit weird. Bit like me, cause I'm a bit weird. I'm a bit on the edge, I'm a bit cool, you know? I'm young - old people don't really get me cause I'm fantastic. Yeah, I'm bloody great. G C F Oh postie please deliver, G C F My sandwich to Jamie Oliver. G F Em That would be the best gift I could give her, D(let ring) F(lrt ring) If my sultana sandwich made it on the Naked Chef. What a gyp! F(let ring) Girls get Jamie Oliver. G And we get Two Fat Ladies.